Obituaries: Dolores Aguilar

This obituary should wake us all up and make the importance of life making a difference in someone Else's life. The showing of caring and loving people is all we have to give. It is never to late to start.

I am sorry to hear of the suffering so many have endured. If Dolores had had a visible physical handicap, she would have probably received medical attention. Unfortunately, disorders of the brain are often not diagnosed or treated. It is "just the way a person is" and everyone has to live with it. Excess anger and meanness are symptoms of Brain Chemistry Imbalances that can be treated with excellent results. There are even brain scan options available now that can accurately diagnose the area of the brain that is over or under active and aid in the diagnosis and treatment needed. It is too late for Dolores, and it is not too late for others and their families who may be struggling.

Yes, this is pretty bad. Good Heavens, I wonder what she did to elicit so much spite as to publish it in her obituary. Yes, I believe that would be the last word.

about time !! everytime someone dies all u hear is good stuff now we all know not everyone in the world is nice. i applaud this man for having the courage to be honest about his mother.

well i applaud thie mans courage in telling it like it was about his mother. all u ever see is nice obits and u just know that not every person in this world is nice. glad to finally see someone acknowledge that for a change

Dolores, I will guess was bipolar. That is a disease that can be treated if she had wanted treatment. I suspect that like many other bipolar people, she ran on the highs and made life hard on her family and dropped into the lows and required constant hand holding. Then there is the ongoing inner rage that can and will strike out at any time.

Taking her meds until she no longer liked what they did to her, usually in a manic stage. Then, without telling anyone, no longer taking them until she lashed out at someone close. After a long life of that, having scared everybody away from her, even though they felt obligated to love her but could not, she died leaving guilt, anger and a deep and abiding sense of relief.

I wonder when her husband clocked out.

If this was meant to be funny, it wasn't.
If true, then you learned well from your mom about spreading your misery and self-absorption around. Share joy.
Life is too short to waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Do something nice for someone else without expectation of the kindness being returned for an invigorating feeling of self-worth!
In other words, get over it and for the love of your kids, don't do to them what you allowed your mother to do to you.

This is very sad. All we have of importance is our time here on earth, loving and being loved. I wonder what kind of a childhood this woman had--if it affected her for the rest of her life. Its just very sad.

Dolores obviously earned her Karma in the news paper obit. Karma is a mother . . the one that isn't baking cookies for her!

Well, we're only hearing one side of this story - from a surviving child. Maybe the deceased WAS a miserable harridan who made the lives of everyone around her a living hell. But it could also be that she may have cosseted, indulged, and spoiled her children to the point that they grew up to be selfish, self-absorbed, and spiteful turds-on-legs. No funeral or memorial services - not even any prayers? Sounds like the surviving kids and grandkids just couldn't be bothered. I know of PETS that got a better send-off than this woman. I would guess that the writer of this obit as well as the other surviving kids and grandkids are NOT pleasant people to be around. They're probably squabbling over Mom's possessions even as I write this. As Shakespeare wrote in "King Lear", "How sharper than a serpent's tooth is an ungrateful child!"

My father passed a couple years ago. He was very very hard to deal with and was mean person. He did however try in the last years of his life to reconcile. Maybe it was too late for some, but he tried. This is a lesson I will always remember for those closest to me.

I really do hope that the whole family feels this way...It seems she has alot of people she left behind..God bless them all...

Hi - This is Mike, former friend, co-worker and lover of Delores.

While this obituary might have left you feeling like you kids got the last word in, let it be know that your mother thought even less of you. Delores was a delightful woman, and it broke her heart that you kids were the most rotten, uncaring and hateful children. Throughout her life, she attempted to make amends with you, but nobody ever even met her half way.

Goodbye Delores, there are a lot of people who will miss you, and won't it be nice that you will finally get some rest from your children.

PS - Little do you know- I got a preview of Delores' last will and testament....I got the money you thankless bast%@*rds!!!!!

THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I TOLD MY FAMILY TO DO WHEN I DIE....TELL THE TRUTH THE WAY YOU REALLY FEEL, NOT WHAT YOU ARE EXPECTED TO SAY.......I KNOW MY FAULT'S,AND I KNOW MY GOOD POINT'S.....BUT NOT EVERYONESEE'S THE SAME WAY,SO TELL IT LIKE YOU SEE IT,AND MAKE NO APOLOGY'S FOR BEING HONEST.

'we may have had some fond memories of her and perhaps we will think of those times too'..... I hope that Delores can rest in peace and that her surviving family can move forward.

Mike-431321... if you were her friend, coworker and lover, why is it that you have spelled her name as Delores, rather than how the obits have it as Dolores? Maybe you aren't really who you say you are but good and creative comment.

I can sympathize with these children and grandchildren. My sisters, our children and husbands were "dumped" for a friend (who did illegal things) not even a boyfriend, by our mother. She may be my mother forever, but something like that hurts forever too!

This could be my mother's obit! I've been estranged from her, my sister, and brother for two years; and it was the best thing I ever did. I wish I'd cut ties with them decades ago. My advice to Dolores' family is get a good counselor and try to get on with your life. Take your memories of your mother and use them as an example of what you DON'T want to be.

For those of you who will judge her children, I give you a quote from my favorite band Metallica (via the Bible), "judge not lest ye be judged yourself."

To Dolores' children I say, reconcile your actions with yourself (and your God if you're so inclined) and f*ck the outsiders who would judge you. They never walked in your shoes, and it's none of their bloody business. You (just like I) could probably write volumes about the torment you endured.

Best wishes to you. I hope you find happiness.

I guess when all is said and done, another thing I'll be greatful for is having never met you Dolores. Jim in Arizona

I knew Dolores Aguilar. This is a lie about her life. Her 2 daughters wrote this because they were banned from her home due to their drug use and illegal behavior. They had many kids, dropped them off her door and wanted to wander in and out when they wanted to visit.

Dolores was a wonderful lady. But she had to have thick skin. She couldn't allow them to keep coming back and forth, confusing the kids and having them run around with her daughters who were in their own addiction.

She loved animals, she was pleasant to neighbors, and it's really quite funny that only now that she's dead they can come back and talk about her but when she was alive they dared come and tell her anything to her face.

So, no fear to the public. The fear is to have someone lie about you when you are dead. They should check these women and see what kind of people they are. If there was an obituary about them, this is how it should read:

Here are two women,
who gave their mother heartache.
Who worried their father as they disappeared for weeks at a time.
Dropping off their children, from different fathers at the doorstep.
Stealing from their family to support their habit.
Living wasteful lives, as they begged their way back into their children.
Only to use them, and hook them into the same drugs they were into.
They wanted to come in the house they used to live in.
But their mother learned. And she closed the door.
To heartaches, to threats, to worries, to hate.
And when their mother lived in peace, with their children under her roof.
They waited. And waited. And waited.
Until she died, and then finally, they said -
We'll get the last word.
No one knew this 80 year old lady.
We can say whatever we want.
But people knew the real Dolores.
And people knew the real them as well.
Hate was still with them.
Since they refused to part with it.

Come on. This obit is not true. It was run in our local Bay Area paper as well as a town in Colorado as I found out from another blog. It was mentioned on the Dr. Laura radio show as it was run in her town too. It is a prank and or a comment on today's society. Convenient that no town or city is noted as to where she died. I think someone wanted to create a mystery and some buzz, just to see where it goes and if it will be carried on national news and investigated.

Those of you who judge the obituary as harsh are right. But you are not right in your said knowledge of how one SHOULD act towards their abusive mother, father, etc. No one knows what occurred in that household but the immediate family, even if the details are blurred. I don't care if you work with them every single day, sleep with them or watch movies every Tuesday night, no one knows them like their family. I had a father that beat his three children and wife with a baseball bat/anything on hand because we drank one too many sodas, or dropped an egg. He sexually abused my sister for 6 years among countless other atrocities , sent his kids to emergency rooms over and over, had judges stand by him because he was an "upstanding citizen". Later after his death, his girlfriend at the time kept telling me what a "good man" he was, she knew nothing of the man that drastically changed after marriage. When you have experienced evil, you look at the world a different way, any one else cannot begin to know what it is like.

Hard to believe. Very sad. Makes one think that rhis is untrue.

ouch! regardless of how mean or nasty somebody is, the person obviously in this case, their mom, still brought them into this world. without her they and their children would not exist! so they did do one good thing! if you hate the person so much, just leave it be and don't say squat, especially if there isn't even a service or anything. there is no point to it. nobody else wants to hear other peoples drama and b.s!